Van for Sale!

Only 247000 miles! These are highway miles only except for a few interruptions from a tow truck! This vehicle uses dinosaur fuel! No need to have to worry where your next charging station is? You can drink your alcohol rather than dump it in your fuel tank! If grid power fails at your motel stay you can keep going! Not dependent on solar power! A cloudy day will not delay your trip! This van only has one computer rather than fifty or so where diagnosis for a do it your selfer makes life easy! This van actually has a spare tire! No re-calls to worry about! No payments for the next 7 years! Tag plates 20 bucks per year! Good acceleration however some people will flip you off as they pass you by! This van is not for the show off crowd but you purchase this van for yourself not for others! Much cheaper that way! You will have no false friends with this van! No women hanging around thinking you have money! Bums along the road will give you a thumbs down! People will leave two parking spaces on either side of you in any parking lot! No one will hit you for the money! No need to pay high interest loans as title pawn will turn you down! With this van you will have money for other things! If you park at the Good Will store you will fit in and not stand out! We have all seen the Mercedes parked at the Good Will Store! No one will steal this van! Cops will not bother you because they figure you cannot pay the fine! People will always feel sorry for you! If you love sympathy this van is for you! You can teach your children and grand children humility as an inheritance vehicle! If you are a nobody looking to be a somebody this vehicle is probably not for you! If you are a somebody and tired of the attention this would be a wonderful disguise where you could blend in! This vehicle will save you lots of money because car shield will not insure! That savings will cover all your expenses! The vehicle is no longer listed in Blue Book! No more lies from car salesmen! No more gimmicks! Follow the science to this great opportunity to up your game!

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